How to drive someone crazy from 1100 miles away

31 May 2006

The job and other headaches

So, I think I may need to do a bit of restructuring of my life. The job is giving me headaches. Let's just say, you know that problem you have at your job? And how your friend has a different problem at her job, and your other friend has a completely different problem at his job? I got all those problems right now.

In the midst of this, I had a long and lovely conversation via telephone with Cyn. The Swan who owns half this blog, even though she thinks she's too good to post to all you wonderful people out there listening to me ramble about nada. (Are you out there?) Find some time and say hi, Cyn!

So, apparently she lives in the Happy Place. You know, of "find your Happy Place" fame? And when she stopped to realize that she is living in the Happy Place, she noted that surreal happiness has indeed occured. I described her home setting to her in my most calming New Age therapist's voice: Picture yourself in a charming New England cottage. You are sitting in the garden, near the pond, watching the swans swim gracefully across the water to the small waterfall. You look through the glass in the door of the cottage and see your husband, who loves you, and whom you love. You are knitting lace, and thinking about the angora bunny you will be getting at the end of the summer, and about your job, where you just got a promotion that makes all your educational dollars spent worthwhile.

No shit, people. THIS IS HER LIFE. i hate her, too.

So, if the woman with whom I share a brain is idyllically (sp?) happy, then to balance out the world, I must be miserable at my job, live in a too-crowded house, and be ready to amputate all my knitting fingers (no offense meant to any amputees reading) due to a gross fungus that came out of my precious ebony needles. Okay, so I'm keeping all my fingers, I made that part up, but does everything else have to be such a mess? Especially when I have such a great view of how happy life can be?

And maybe I am just being jealous, and therefore blowing up the crappiness surrounding me. Even though, fair audience, I am sure you understand there is stuff going on that I am just not saying. Stuff like I had to declare bankruptcy and it all went down less than a month ago. For example. But, ya know??? It ain't so bad. Got a great man. Got a huge yarn stash (if only they would ship my needles!!!!), and many things to work on. Got a cute kitty; got decent (if plentiful) roommates. (Oh, yeah, did I ever mention that in addition to the boyfriend, we live with a small family? It's a big house.) I make decent money, plenty to support myself and have a tiny bit of fun. Crap, did you just catch me counting my blessings? I hate those stupid count-your-blessings people. Dammit.

So, on to the self-loathing for counting my blessings!! Yayy! Apparently, it's a bi-polar type of day.

Love from the Cranky Dragon

29 May 2006

Every blog needs cat pictures

I am one of those never speechless people. I always have something to rant about. And now that I have this open forum in which to spew the masses of crapola floating around in my nearly-translucent gray matter, I can't think of a damn thing to say. Okay, maybe some background?

I wait tables, and no, I am not still in school. I do it for a legitimate living. Bite me.

I have a midget cat named Eskimo, under whose name I post to my best friend's personal blog (go ahead and psychoanalyze, I've heard it all). This is the midget kitty. He is a breed called Munchkin, and they carry the gene for dwarfism, like Dachsunds and Basset hounds. So, tiny legs. He looks like a ferret with a cat head, or like a really scared cat slinking along the ground, until he slinks for three days and you realize: he just has no legs.



I have a wonderful man, goes by the name Yoshi. When I got him, he looked like this:

And yes, he was surprised about the whole thing (more on that someday). That's why he looks like that. That was last February. He has since grown the white skunk stripe out of his hair and moved in with me. More someday why the moving in was such a big honking deal. But I love this little punk rock boy. He cooks, loves Henry Rollins, reads comic books with some edge to them, wants to make movies, and reads me bedtime stories. No shit. Don't knock it 'til you've tried it.

Oh, and I knit. I sadly have no pictures of me knitting, and no way to get some any time in the next 20 minutes, so cry your eyes out at the loss. I suppose technically I am a beginner, although I very rarely see anything that intimidates me in a pattern. I just have so few finished objects that I feel I would be doing an advanced knitter a great disservice by equating myself with them. I am actually somewhat philosophical about the knitting. I like a meditative approach. More on that later.

So, I'll have this blog forever, right? Have I bored you enough, can I say more about myself later?

And, Cyn, who the hell are you?

26 May 2006

I feel just like a big girl

Which isn't likely to happen as I stopped growing at 5'. But no, I have a great big, brand new blog to play with, courtesy of my bestest pal. She of the techno savvy.
And thank goodness for her, or you would never get to experience the human train wreck that is me.

So, welcome to our blog. Thanks a pile, my little swan, for building us a home with a mailbox and some comfy furniture. Can't wait to start hanging pictures on the walls.

Lisa (the Dragon of Swan and Dragon)